Twitter, Online Voice and Safe Learning Spaces

I commented on Mr. Robert Paris' blog a few days' ago. It was in response to his concerns about Twitter and how to provide a safe space for students to fail and not be subject to ridicule. My comment was so long that I think it's worth reproducing on my own blog for others to comment on.

Hi, I’m an ALT Labber who is currently teaching an online course (I do not use the term online class as I see an association of a “class” with a physical space). I use Twitter judiciously, as part of my online teaching kit. I sort of feel that gives me some credibility to jump into this conversation with all of you.

I’m a passionate advocate of inclusive teaching, which means creating safe spaces for my students is a priority for me. I encourage my students to use Twitter for immediate direct communication with me. In this way, I know they are present just as they know I’m present — creating online teaching and social presence is an online teacher’s attempt to humanize online learning. With the asynchronous nature of most online teaching, I appreciate Twitter technology and the immediacy it provides in letting me know I can indicate my presence and availability to my students.

That being said, I try to balance both — supporting inclusive safe spaces with open pedagogy. I don’t tweet everything nor expect my students to blabber without discernment. They know that there are some things they could Direct Message (DM) me about. If I know an issue would embarrass them, I DM them. Of course, there is that whole “dignity of risk” argument too. I quote this from my blog post:

“Supposedly, this phrase was coined in the 1970s regarding the subject of care for people with disabilities. I could see this applied in educational contexts. Allow students the liberty to try things for themselves, first. Don’t try to coddle them. Of course, we don’t like to see them get hurt and that’s where the discernment of the teacher is welcomed. I see this as an area of struggle for teachers as we move towards open pedagogy. We are fearful. We are anxious. We worry that they might get bullied, hurt, write or say the wrong things that backfire and brand them for life; leaving digital footprints that ruin their future prospects. Remember, we are the guide on the side, and we are there for them, consistently.” (http://justywk.blogspot.com/2015/05/quick-notes-vcuiit15.html)

I offer my students the opportunity to try something new because it’s a thinking disposition that supports productive thinking. Exploring the web with Twitter and blogs is quite an imperative I’d say in nurturing digital literacy. Helping students find their online voice is just as important as giving them the opportunity to have an audible voice in the classroom. Vicki Davis, an educator from whom I’ve learned much via Twitter, taught me that “a student without a blog is a student without a voice.” Here’s a funny but true meme:https://twitter.com/MitchChampagne/status/557555426321907716/photo/1

In elementary school, I wrote for one (maybe). Let your students #blog and write for the world. #edchat #literacy pic.twitter.com/bqYZAHXPcd

— Mitch Champagne (@MitchChampagne) January 20, 2015

I want my students to find their voice, using the best available technology out there. Having an online voice is not something teachers can ignore in the 21st C and letting them write for the world in 140 characters is one way to help them. Not the only way, of course.

I understand your hesitancy because using Twitter or a private web video chat session is a decision I sometimes struggle to make, regularly, as long as my course is on. Safe space, open space, both, or more? There is not a perfect ANSWER. There are questions I try to deal with a case at a time, a day at a time. My course is located at http://rampages.us/clearthinking/ if you would like to check it out.

Welcome to online teaching! Thanks for the space to articulate some of my thoughts.

 Quite a blog comment. It was written at the spur of the moment. Writing is without a word my favorite way to articulate my thinking. Now, moving on to a response to something about multimodality. 

In Faculty Words: From Desire to Educated Ability to Promote Inclusivity

Simulation of Visual Challenges

Faculty Development. A phrase I've long considered rather odd and incongruous. Maybe it's because I've been emotionally damaged by the words of one of my ID professors in grad school. He told me that faculty (in his world) hate the term "faculty development" because they are already developed. They don't need to develop anymore. They are possibly open to training, but not development. Another reputable ed psych and edtech professor who upon learning that I was going to tread the path of a practitioner (and not join the hallowed halls of academia) after finishing doctoral studies, wished me good luck in convincing faculty that someone could teach "better" than they did. So you see, I'm somewhat scarred. (Note: I still have faith in working with faculty, just that on some days I feel these words haunt me.)

But faith in the desire of faculty to want to improve their teaching surged when I read the following goals of some of our participants in the Institute on Inclusive Teaching 2015:

"I want to advance from the desire for inclusivity toward the educated ability to promote it, in any setting."

"I find that my own process of “de-colonizing” my mind and examining my various privileged identities has a direct bearing on my working relationship with students and faculty, through my increasing openness to and understanding of perspectives radically different from my own." 

Ultimately, I want to explore and expand upon my existing conceptualizations of diversity within my discipline so as to develop a more cohesive framework for integrating inclusivity across my instructional approaches, course content, and pedagogical content.

I witness failures from students who are struggling because they do not have the time to study. They have to work to pay tuition and they are too tired when they arrive in class to learn, let alone do their homework. In other words, those who succeed are those who have both the means and the will to study. Students also come from diverse school districts with more or less well developed language programs. Their ability to perform in my class depends also on their previous high school experience. Those who graduated from a demanding high school program passed my class with flying colors. I sympathize with my weaker students who have many odds stacked against them.

In my opinion, the diverse classroom should be accessible to everyone and anyone, but this is not the case. The greatest challenge in the XYZ courses has been 1) how to make our online content meaningfully accessible to visually impaired students, whether it is in the web-based workbook or the grammar exercises in our LMS, and 2) how to develop other types of comparable course content for them. Two out of the three visually impaired students I have taught have been unsuccessful in our courses due to these structural and curricular shortcomings.

As a public institution, it’s vital for VCU to maintain connections to its surrounding communities, especially disadvantaged ones. I think this starts with recruiting and supporting economically disadvantaged and historically underrepresented students. I don’t know how to do this on my own, but I want to do what I can to make it happen, and for me this begins in the classroom.

Amazing. Dedicated. Caring. Teachers who want to do better. Teachers who spent 5 days from 9 to 4 to learn how to improve their teaching. Not one or two. But 15 of them. Thank you for these unassuming courageous warriors in the educational arena.

Institute on Inclusive Teaching: Quick Notes

[Related blogposts: 2014 Reflections on the Institute on Inclusive Teaching;
There's a Place for Us; EdContexts full version]

Major Ideas from Institute that Resonated with Me.

Last year, it took me a couple of weeks to distill my thoughts into a blogpost. This image captures some of the ideas I'm mulling over.

Structural Poverty.

We meet again
Through veiled window glass frosted by body heat
Rain pelted outside and within
Wetting my white linen and polka-dotted leggings
My guilt and helplessness remained
What is going through Jolene's mind
Rain, like a windscreen-wiper, will it flick away the torrent of injustice 

The Richmond Hill experience remained a memorable experience for participants. Structural poverty brought about by policies or the lack of them, stares at one in the eye, in significant pockets of Richmond, Virginia (RVA).

I stumbled upon this tweet on President Rao's twitter stream which helps illustrate this concept of structural poverty in RVA:

New maps released today w @RWJF showing how short distances can mean large gaps in #health http://t.co/uHRq19LDjO pic.twitter.com/6ykFVrt6cJ

— VCU SocHealth (@VCUSocHealth) April 29, 2015

"One's experience of traumatizing awareness should not paralyze us into inaction."

True. But what can we do?

"Change what you can change."

And so we push on, for the third year now, to raise awareness and reach out to faculty about various issues of inclusivity in VCU. Our definition of inclusivity is:

Moving towards inclusivity includes an intention of reflecting on ideas and assumptions, and becoming aware of differences in order to gain insight and transform our practices.

We hope that participants will begin the journey of transforming their teaching practices with the ideas they have gathered from this week's learning.

Inclusive teaching can thus be viewed as encompassing issues of access to educational opportunities; student involvement in academic work as well as personal and professional growth; student retention and success; and classroom and institutional climate.

Punitive Justice vs. Unitive Justice (Restorative Justice). 

Fodder for most lawyers. Not for Sylvia Clute, who calls herself a "recovering attorney." Why? In her own words:

Being able to distinguish between punitive and unitive justice clears up a lot of the confusion. When we understand this distinction, our world of greed, violence and war in the midst of breathtaking acts of love, kindness and generosity makes perfect sense.  When we analyze the two systems, we discover that punitive justice reflects a dualistic way of thinking that makes the "us versus them" dichotomy seem reasonable. Unitive justice recognizes the interconnectedness of all that is - that what we do to others, we do to ourselves.  

Sylvia Clute works with schools and organizations in Richmond to facilitate restorative circles and teach conflict mediation classes. She has published a few books, one of which is Beyond vengeance, beyond duality: A call for a compassionate revolution. Ready for a paradigm shift? It's time.

Dignity of Risk.

One of the most beautiful phrases I've heard the entire week. Supposedly, this phrase was coined in the 1970s regarding the subject of care for people with disabilities. I could see this applied in educational contexts. Allow students the liberty to try things for themselves, first. Don't try to coddle them. Of course, we don't like to see them get hurt and that's where the discernment of the teacher is welcomed. I see this as an area of struggle for teachers as we move towards open pedagogy. We are fearful. We are anxious. We worry that they might get bullied, hurt, write or say the wrong things that backfire and brand them for life; leaving digital footprints that might ruin their future prospects. Remember, we are the guide on the side, and we are there for them, consistently.

Food Shock. 

It has been some 15 years for me since I first set foot in America. I don't recall if I had any food shock. It was more of a loss to not be able to taste our delicate and fine Singapore cuisine again. After all, we are a Food Paradise. The portion sizes, American Chinese food and different smells and tastes made me crave Singapore food intensely. After 15 years, I still miss the fine dining outlets in Singapore and the ability to meet friends and dine late into the night with them.  The international students who visited us at the Institute shared many significant vignettes from their perspectives. I could identify with most of them. Many participants were struck by a point raised by an international graduate student. That we should not confuse "competence" with "confidence." Boldness (maybe loudness?) in speaking up should not be confused with greater competence. It seemed revelatory to many of the non-international participants. This is good. Let the shift begin.

There's a Place for Us

[I revised this piece quite a bit and it is published at EdContexts: http://edcontexts.org/diversity/theres-a-place-for-us/]

In late 1999, I relocated to the USA and have had much adventure navigating cross-cultural zones of change. As a Singaporean Chinese, I am often perceived as someone from the Republic of China, which is not a problem or a bad thing at all. It is when I am expected to exhibit behaviors that go along with that misperception that things get awkward and challenging. What follows are little snippets of the faux pas some people have committed in an attempt to relate to me. These illustrations highlight the fact that there is substantial work to be done in the area of education and awareness about dealing with difference.

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American White Male Prof: The opening ceremony of the Beijing Olympics was wonderful. Those Chinese girls didn't smile at all while performing. (Looks at Yin to explain why.)
Yin: *scratches head*

[Note: This is a faux pas that tends to happen because most people see me as Chinese, but I am a Singaporean. My grandparents migrated to Malaya and then to Singapore.]

********************************************************

American White Male: You speak such good English compared to other Chinese. How is that so?
Yin: ???

[Note: Again, this is a social blunder that happens because most people see me as a Chinese from China, but I am a Singaporean. And there is a presumption that Chinese internationals don’t speak or write good English. This is an overgeneralization. I’m always amused more than offended to see the shock on people’s faces when they read my writing or hear me speak.]

********************************************************
American White Male: So do you eat dog meat or cat meat?

[Note: This is a bad joke. The perception and assumption that I'm Chinese is associated with the idea that Chinese people eat strange stuff like monkey brains or dog meat. This is an overgeneralization.]

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International Female Faculty Client. I interacted with her substantially at our Center's training sessions. I presented her my business card and offered to work with her. She subsequently chose to work with another Female designer (who is also White).

[Note: This is not an indictment of the faculty decision. She has her reasons for her choices. I chose to include these next three examples because I want to highlight that sometimes, we may not be aware of our unconscious decisions. In Singapore, for instance, we were a colony of Britain and at times, the colonial mentality remains and is exhibited in some behaviors. Some Singaporeans consider Caucasians to be superior to Asians and look to them for solutions to their problems. It could work the other way too; people may be intimidated by the supposedly model minority, Asians.]

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Black Female Client contacts African colleague to work with her on accessibility issues after checking out our web bios. She was redirected to me.

[Note: People are comfortable with people who are more like them. It's human nature.]

********************************************************
White Female Client was assigned to work with me. Emailed me subsequently to say she was going to switch and work with another Female designer (who also happened to be White).

[Note: Same rationale as above.]

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Invited to a large corporate firm for an interview which was then delayed for some time. At the meeting, interviewers made snide remarks about my being overqualified. I was subsequently not hired.

[Note: This happened quite frequently to me and my international friends who were selected for interviews to meet diversity requirements. Unfortunately, I think this is how people play games to beat bureaucracy.]

*********************************************************

Diversity. Accessibility. Inclusivity. These are buzzwords in higher education. We hear them so often, I wonder if they lose their meaning for those in privileged circumstances. I think I was desensitized until I worked on my dissertation and when I first got involved with a planning committee that does work related to these buzzwords.

It is one work project that keeps me going, even on days when I feel irrelevant and wonder what all my 30 years of specialized training in Instructional Design is for. It's the Institute on Inclusive Teaching (May 18-22, 2015). When I do anything, no matter how small, for the project, I feel that I'm making a difference, and I know that what I'm doing will have a ripple effect, through time. There are real problems to solve; awareness to create; educational sessions to design and facilitate. There is a reason why I'm there, in the committee. There's a reason for all those years of education.

When I'm with the committee, I work less at making people understand the implications of diversity. I don't have to negotiate so hard at the intersections. People in the committee have been misunderstood in some way by someone (unintentionally?), have lived experiences of these issues and thus know how important it is to be inclusive and to educate people to be inclusive. I am at home in such a diverse multicultural setting like Singapore.

"If you don't live it, it won't come out of your horn." - Charlie Parker, musician. 

Among my committee friends, I find myself. And in turn I can help others to find themselves and not feel lost.

The Institute focuses on issues of access and equity in education, core goals of education. We touch on issues of social justice, stereotype threats, solo status, inclusive learning design, international students' acculturative stress and facilitate the transfer of these knowledge to instructors' design of courses.

At the 2009 UNESCO World Conference on Higher Ed, the OECD Secretary-General said:

“The first priority is access and equity… the second priority area is efficiency and effectiveness [and] the third area is quality and relevance.” – Angel Gurria, OECD Secretary-General. 

Access and equity, these are two priority areas that make me get up in the morning to go to work. If I don't find myself fighting for these causes anymore, I think my work will have lost a significant bout of meaning.

If you are still wondering what I'm talking about, please visit the project site at http://rampages.us/inclusiveteaching/ 

If you are considering applying for this Institute, hurry up, we have very very few seats left.

2015 Institute on Inclusive Teaching 

3 More Myths about Instructional Designers

[Draft 1: April 6, 12:38am; Updated: April 6, 9:45am]

In the past, I've written about the myths and mischaracterization of instructional designers (ID). I realize that such perceptions (or misperceptions) exist across many fields and disciplines, but I think I found more to add to my growing list of misperceptions about IDs as I work in the field. This post seeks to increase understanding about IDs and filter more silt from the muddy waters.

[FYI, I'm not going to tread on contentious turf about learning designer vs. instructional designer. Joshua Kim has written about this and a few others. This post is about IDs working in higher education.]

1. Instructional designers don't understand the challenges of faculty members. 

"Edufolks versus Non-Edufolks." (Terms coined by a professor).

• Faculty members who have ed psych or learning science backgrounds versus faculty with no learning science backgrounds. 

• IDs who work with faculty members who have learning science backgrounds and IDs who work with faculty with no learning science backgrounds (Non-Edufolks). 

Some Non-Edufolks think IDs apparently don't "get" faculty or "understand" them. IDs are too full of theory and don't teach (can't teach? no chance to teach?). "What do they know about our challenges?"

I happen to have many of these attributes: I'm an Edufolk with a PhD in IDD&E, (Yes, I can teach, design, develop, evaluate, do research. I'm a social scientist. Quant or qual, I can do both, and write a mean IRB), who has real-world teaching experience in Singapore and in America, in higher education. I'm also trained in a Teaching College in Singapore and certified to teach in the schools there.

I do get you. And I believe a majority of IDs do get you, in the best and worst of circumstances.

2. Instructional design and teaching are two separate responsibilities.

Are we creating a false dichotomy between IDs and those who were hired primarily as Professors?

I'm an Administrative and Professional faculty, not an Assistant Prof. But I've spent more than 10 years in Syracuse University working with faculty as an instructional technology consultant/Blackboard LMS administrator, working on e-portfolios, implementation of new software, working in a faculty development center, teaching workshops to faculty and graduate teaching assistants, teaching higher education courses, etc. Does this indicate somewhat (plenty?) that I understand faculty?  We seem to see ID as being separate from teaching. IDs are teachers too, and vice versa. They may not teach fulltime but I believe many of them teach and have significant experience working with faculty before attaining ID credentials. (P.S. I also think it is important for them to be affiliated as faculty with the School of Education in the institution they work in. This continues to give them opportunities to teach and enriches them professionally.)

3. Instructional designers are too full of learning theories, mostly stuff that the "average" faculty member doesn't need to know. 

By way of training, IDs are learning scientists. It is essential that we studied and continue to study how people learn so we can offer the best service to our clients. But, have you heard me spout learning theories in front of faculty members? Does any ID do that? Maybe in my blog, I may use a bit of jargon, because I'm writing to and for IDs. If you have written a dissertation before, you do understand that we were trained not to write in jargon because some defense committee readers will come from other disciplines. One of the reasons why I chose to do a qualitative research study is so that I will write and sound more like a human being, and not write in a formulaic way. Also, one interesting tidbit: the first thing we learned in ID grad school is to talk about ID to an audience such as our grandparents. If they don't get me, I've failed abysmally.

Dear Professor, with yes/no learning science background or teaching certification, it doesn't matter any one way to me if you are Edufolk or Non-Edufolk. I get you. Please let me help you.

Hodge Podge of Thoughts on Inclusive Teaching Institute

 

Looking down at Shockoe Valley from Richmond Hill Retreat Center

I thought of you 
In the land of plenty
Disconnected from the rest of Richmond city
Riding in a car
Someone pointed out
"This school's roof leaked. 
The ceiling tile hit a child!"
What went through the minds of young students
To be broken up and bused to different strange schools?
Further the car took me 
To another school sited next to the city jail
Hope sits adjacent to despair
City planning gone awry
Or a deliberate act of marginalization
In the four Courts silence pervaded
There were no children skipping in backyards
Nor grownups in congenial chatter
A police car, no, two, circled these housing projects
Turns in the road
Led me back to my rustic retreat
Cast down by the privilege of knowing

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

A girl received a scholarship offer to go to college but did not have $12 to pay for a required transcript for her application. When she finally found the money to do so, the scholarship fund had largely been depleted. 

A man was offered a job. He couldn't accept it because he couldn't get to work. City buses do not ply the roads of his neighborhood. 

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

My learning experience at the 2014 Summer Institute for Inclusive Teaching was thrilling and disturbing. Since the close of the Institute, I have found it difficult to write about the week's experience. I lost my "voice." I couldn't muster strength nor heart to blog or tweet. These activities seemed frivolous to me when poverty and injustice had stared at me so blatantly. I had never considered if I had been raised in circumstances of privilege. Yet listening to the speakers on all five days, I couldn't help but wonder if my education and hence privilege of knowing had led me to adequate action for the public good.

At the Institute, I was like a sponge soaking up new concepts. Having been raised in the island-state of multiracial Singapore, appreciation for and support of diversity has been a natural part of my life. But back there, I didn't think, or maybe more aptly, didn't have to think, about stereotype threats, gender inclusion or other forms of marginalization. I was a member of the dominant race. I was surrounded by friends of different racial and linguistic groups. Educated in a girls' school (Like bell hooks of Teaching to Transgress), I received empowering education. In the USA, I am or became part of a minority group -- an oft-perceived model minority group. I have often been told in the face that I'm over-motivated and that I need to "slow down." It seems in the USA people see me and read "privilege" or "always looking for number 1" (which couldn't be further from the truth). I frequently let these remarks pass. What are these names when I've been called worse things in the USA? These terms have no meaning to me. I'm having fun as I learn and do what other people perceive is "difficult" or too accelerated a pace for me. Yet, these remarks occur far too often the longer I've been in the USA and particularly when I encounter people who have limited cross-cultural awareness and experience.

"How did you find the strength to respond to such ignorance?" I was asked.

The short answer is, I didn't know my own strength. (Go check Whitney Houston's song)

As disturbing as the week's events have been, I relished my time of learning and the camaraderie that has developed among the participants and our Faculty Learning Community (which served as a planning committee for the Institute). We were as different and diverse as an inclusive FLC could possibly be within the constraints of a higher ed institution. Working with them was affirming and comforting. They understood my struggles. I am not alone with the misperceptions and sometimes coercion by other people to make me become more like them. For instance, when I'm not as noisy as some people want me to be, Lisa Webb, my disability work buddy understands it's because I'm comfortable with another language, a world without sounds. I'm at ease with Deaf people and that in the visual poetry of gestures and ASL, "voice" is realized a different way. I don't need to use sounds to draw attention to myself. More accurately, I dislike drawing attention to myself. I'd rather people look at my work and appreciate my ideas. [Yes, it's hard to separate the individual from the idea, but think Terence Malick of Tree of Life whose films I admire.] Chinese expresses it best for me: 不爱出风头。 Even when other people think I'm "silent," I'm not without voice. Most people don't cross as many "worlds" as I do in one setting - English, Chinese, Cantonese and signing. Lara dos Passos Coggin, one of my FLC members who is bilingual (or maybe more) expressed the multilingual person's struggles in a compelling way for me (not exact words):

"Some people who are monolingual do not understand the multiplicity of resources (and thus, interference) a multilingual person has access to and are processing as they seek to express themselves."

Something else she said continues to ring in my mind,

"Diversity nourishes and feeds my soul. I need it to flourish."

She captured a dominant desire of mine.

My plea to people who are experts in one language and focuses on only one: have patience and to not think you need to help multilingual speakers find the words they need to elegantly and eloquently express themselves. They have an abundance of symbolic conventions and knowledge domains to mash up into creative expressions.

It has been hard to write this post but I want to capture some of these memories before they fade from my mind. I might reword or add more thoughts later. Writing is one of my loves so it is a struggle to want to do your best at being clear, parsimonious (in the tradition of Howard Becker, inspired by my advisor) and thoughtful when your thoughts are half-formed. But this will do for now.

A Reflection on Tribes the Play

"Tribes" by Nina Raine at Barrow Street Theatre

Source: http://barrowstreettheatre.com/whats-on/tribes.asp

I didn't know what to expect from the play. I went with one goal: to watch border-crossing enact in hybrid spaces when a Deaf actor works with non-Deaf actors and to do "research" for my dissertation. So here's my short reflective poem about the play:

Clamor
Of sound and silence
Language
Signed or spoken
By them
We live, love
Or not

Tell me
Don't leave me
Out
Speak my language
Understand me
By
Whose terms?

Two paths
Onward we trod
Center or edge
Will we meet
At some point?

"Until
I stopped
Talking
You didn't
Hear me
I can't
Be here
Any longer"

Try
Tell me
Sign me
Love me
I love, love, love you
Sound not needed
For admission

yin wah kreher
copyright, dec 28, 2012

Vignettes: NYC 12.26.12 - 12.27.12

"No gum popping. Gum popping. Gum popping."

"Zero tolerance policy."

We turned to look at each other, my fellow passenger, a black lady with a British accent. She rolled her eyes and gestured with her right hand, saying in silence, "What's up with this driver?"

The passengers obeyed. The trip to NYC passed uneventfully. I didn't need a pepper spray after all, vanquishing an acquaintance's hypothesis that I was headed for catastrophe by taking a Greyhound bus to the Big Apple.

She didn't talk to me during most of the journey. I didn't want to disturb her. Her back was towards me as she  rested. Occasionally, she would file her nails or moisturize her hands and face. The cream smelled good. As we reached the terminal, she talked about the only city in America she would and could live in: New York city. And in other parts of the world? London. Paris? Passe, although she could speak French. She was international and couldn't imagine living anywhere else. We talked about Hongkong after she found out I was from Singapore ("a bit sterile").

"I could live there," she said about Hongkong.

"Xi-oy" (Cantonese for water), she offered this word for mirth. I laughed.

"Yes! In the right tones too!"

"Hou!" (Cantonese for good) I laughed once more.

And she vanished into the Port Authority Terminal crowd.

********

8 hours later. Through cloudy dark weather most of the way, I landed at Port Authority Terminal. We had ridden into a winter storm. (Why did I leave sunny Richmond?) With a heavy haversack (not so when I was packing) and a big tote, I meandered through the never-ending frenzied hordes of people at Times Square. Snowflakes larger than the size of quarters pelted down my long past-the-knee goose-down outercoat; rain ensured I whip out my umbrella. Well, for maybe 5 minutes. My umbrella succumbed to the strong gusts of wind. Past Sephora, down Broadway, I trudged on. No yellow cab would go to my hotel. Walk I must then. Without an umbrella, I lost some verve, or maybe nerve, as to when and whether I would reach my hotel. $14.88 less later, I got another umbrella and persisted.

Down Broadway, past 6th Avenue. The hotel sign with flashing lights came into view.

I stumbled into my high-class dorm, with bunk beds, that cost 4 times my play ticket.

*********

12.27.12

Heading out early. People-watching with a MacDonald's breakfast.

3 words. Wet.grey.cold

Am I getting close?

Who'd have guessed? Greenwich House=Barrow Street Theatre.

***************

I relented. I would take the train to get to 42nd Street from Barrow Street (which was near 4th Street). It was too cold at 5pm to walk.

I got on the A-train and sat down. There were no announcements. I missed the Times Square-42nd Street station. It was already the 50th Street. Fine. I got out and hopped onto the next train to get back to 42nd Street-Bryant Park.

Out of the train into the streets. Amongst travelers who were frequently taking pictures. Posing. Grinning. Is it me? Am I too tired or just longing for the solitude to reflect on the powerfully visceral play I had trekked so far to watch?

The Port Authority Terminal building loomed large. I made it down two levels and found the station.

****************

A young girl originally from Puerto Rico sat next to me. If I thought I was inexperienced at taking buses (Well, I'd always flown), here was someone who was more anxious, although she didn't really show it. It was her first trip out of NYC into another state in the US. I told her I'd never taken a greyhound before since I arrived a decade ago. She looked and voiced her thrill at finding a "good person" on this trip, someone as "green" as she was. It was a compliment.

A dermatologist-in-training. A dancer. She gives back to the community through dance. She made me feel better about myself and my dreams. I wanted to be where she was, at her young age she was doing much more than I was at her age. Or maybe just differently.

It was uncanny. We had both seen Tribes, Mama Mia, Jersey Boys, Phantom of the Opera, Les Miserables. She insists she wouldn't watch Les Mis in film. I laughed.

"Just enjoy the music?" I said weakly. I couldn't even convince myself. Russell Crowe ruined it.

Our conversation centered around arts, theater, and the translation of theater into movies. We both agreed. Movies could never replace live theater.

The back of the bus was noisy. Some guys were talking loudly. I wish the first Greyhound driver was here to hush him up.

"Zero tolerance policy."I won't be amused this time.

****************

Chesapeake House. Alexandria. Fredericksburg ... 7 hours later, I was home.

She'd travel on for 8 more hours. "If we pay attention, we will learn new things we may never have learned before." #CrashCreativity course lessons prepared me in some way to be open to new experiences. 

****************